i am not sure i can explain it, but i believe that this baby that will be ours some day – some way, some how – is a really special and loved person. is. already. not just will be.
my husband and i have been working and praying and working so hard to get him or her here. for a number of years. for as long as we’ve been married, i’d say.
and then there’s my family. and my husband’s family. and we’re not just talking parents and siblings. we’re talking cousins and aunts and uncles. all over the country. and maybe even around the world.
and then there are my friends from all my single years. i have a lot of those. ahem. they’re all over the country, too.
and then there’s my church “family.” let’s just say that it’s a bigger family than i realized.
all of these people. hundreds of them. some of them not even knowing me very well, if at all. (look, my husband’s family is huge, and i just haven’t met everyone yet. and my family, though not as large, is a little less closely knit.)
but anyway. hundreds of people. so many people. praying for us. praying out of love. for us, yes. but also for this baby. all these people love this baby already. all these people have already made sacrifices for this baby.
i’m back to the part where i can’t explain it. let’s just call it a feeling. an educated feeling. but all that love and all that sacrifice somehow mean that this baby is a special person. an incredible person. someone worth the waiting and aching and crying and trying and fasting and praying.